Memory and Motorcycles

I was in Jackson today. My grandmother had let me borrow her car for my lovely trip to Asheville and I returned it today. It felt strange to drive my 5-speed again. The automatic spoiled me a wee bit, but I'm happy to report that I only stalled out once.

Dad treated me and Mamaw to lunch at Primo's Cafe; a staple in any Jacksonian's diet. I had spaghetti- and then had some more of it for dinner tonight. Mamaw was in good spirits and we all had a nice visit.

Mamaw's short-term memory has really been going down hill for the past year or so. We are all starting to worry about her a little bit. I love my Mamaw dearly and am afraid of the possibility of her slipping away from us mentally. She is such a sharp lady and it's alarming when she pauses before stating my name or tells me the same story three times back-to-back without even considering that she might have said it before.

I'm scared of the possibility that she may not be around for my wedding. As I have stated before, her marriage to my grandfather is my inspiration for how to have a successful marriage. I can't imagine getting married without her there. I want to be the one to carry on her legacy as a devoted wife and mother and I want her to see the beginning of that. I have to consider that this may not happen; but I know my grandmother is a strong lady and I am hoping that she will be here for a long while yet.

After lunch, I pleaded with Dad and he took me out on my brother's CBR 1100. It was a beautiful day and I had a wonderful time. My Dad raced motorcycles in his younger days and he and my brother are avid riders. Rumor has it I was conceived on a motorcycle road-trip. It's in my blood. But I haven't been on a bike in years until today. Just like riding a bicycle, you never forget how to ride a motorcycle.

There is such a feeling of freedom when I am on a bike. I don't have to think because I know my dad is an excellent rider and I'll be safe. The wind is so loud that there is no point in trying to think about anything. You just ride. It's life at its most simple.