The Long Road Home

"Coming joys, like tropical shores, throw over the immensity before them their inborn softness, an odorous wind, and we are lulled by this intoxication without a thought of the horizon that we do not even know."
Madame Bovary, by Flaubert

Wesley and I are reading this novel in sections sent to us each day by email. This line in particular has caught my attention.

I feel like I am living two lives. One that is so firmly rooted in the present that it not only feels 'grounded' but as if my feet were stuck in the quagmire. It is the lonely existence of a nursing student living with her two cats in a dumpy little town in Mississippi. This life revolves around medical terms, unpaid bills, neighbors, and cats. The good thing about it is that it is real, it is Present. I can dig my heels in and live it. The downside is knowing that my other life feels just as much like home, but isn't yet mine to have.

My second, more ethereal, life is an existence here in Asheville. It's where my love lies. It is where I feel free and limitless. Here I am comfortable and happy, loved and cared for. When I am here, my plans for the future seem obtainable. Asheville is a beautiful place and feels more like home each time I visit. This is partly due to my love and bond with Wesley, which grows stronger each time we are together. It is enhanced by my familiarity with the town as I spend more time exploring it. My 'tropical shores' are hidden in these mountains, sending me faint signals of what life has in store for me if I can only grab hold of it for myself.

I've been in the clouds for the past week and it has been amazing. But I know that my path to the life I want is a trail laid on the ground, full of roots and stones. I think that I am prepared to go back tomorrow and take on my reality because I know that sooner or later that path will lead me back here.

~I have posted pictures of waterfalls and of the highest point east of the Mississippi.