Obsession

My deepest and sincerest apologies. I know that the world stopped when I let my blog lag. I promise, I promise the sun shall shine again. (Yes, that is sarcasm you detect).

Here is my list of excuses:

1. I was trying my darndest to not fail Complex Health Problems this trimester. You will all be delighted to know, I'm sure, that I did NOT fail that dad-blasted soul-injuring class.

2. I am homeless. Well, kinda homeless. I moved out of the house at Mimosa Lane. The majority of my possessions, and myself for the next two weeks, are in Asheville. I must take this time to say thank you to my dear fiancee for being so obliging as I took over, cluttered up, and girlified (to a small degree), his apartment.

3. I pressed felony charges. My landlord, whom shall remain slightly nameless but may be a dentist who is on the board of directors at a local college, is a creep. My former roommates and I have caught him in our backyard late at night several times. I personally caught him looking in my window late one night while I was naked and bent over to blow dry my hair. Sleeze. What happened after that? He got away with it.

4. I have been without internet at home for a month. Yeah for cutting the bills.

So. What is the obsession all about you ask?

Real estate. I want a home. I want a home so badly I would just about sell my soul to have one. I want a place I can garden, paint, decorate, live in, and have ownership of. I check zillow.com on a daily basis, even though we won't be able to get a house until early next year at best. I have been researching tips for first time homebuyers and this afternoon Wesley and I are going to the bank to have someone spell out the differences between renting vs. buying. I am obsessed. Every waking moment I am thinking about home ownership, what my budget will be, what kind of home I want, how we can make it work, and what locations I like best. It's like the baby clock but only louder. I know where all of the online listings are and I have the real estate guide in my car. It has even overtaken the wedding in my wandering thoughts. Like I said, obsession.

Now that I have confessed; do you have any advice on home ownership, mortgages, or renting vs. buying?

The Incident

After driving 10 hours from Asheville because of nasty rain in Georgia I arrived home at 11:30 Sunday night. Both of the roommates were gone. I wasn't too happy to be home alone, especially since the night I returned from my last trip I caught a peeping tom at my window, which is incidentally about 7-8 ft off the ground. I had the willies but I also had my cat Chloe so I figured I would be okay.

I didn't even bother to unpack my car. I gave Chloe some food, fresh kitty litter, and water then went to my room and tucked myself into my covers. Chloe wasn't far behind me in jumping onto the bed. I was still feeling tense so didn't think much of it when Chloe wouldn't calm down either. She spent all day in the car as well, after all. After a few minutes she settles down and starts to purr. Then thinks got damn strange.

My bedroom door is shut and my light is off. All the doors are locked. I am laying in the quiet emptiness when I hear footsteps coming down the hall past my bedroom. I try to rationalize it away, tell myself I am just tired- maybe even a little paranoid. But the thing is, Chloe sat up, stared out towards the hallway and stopped purring. Ok, no problem, I'll just turn on the lamp. My room is now well-lit, no shadows. Chloe moves to the end of the bed and stares at the door. I refuse to get creeped out. Close my eyes, convince myself it's not a problem, I'm just nuts.

Then I hear the whispers. Oh shit. I start thinking about who I could call at one in the morning the night before the first day of class and realize that I need to just suck it up and force myself to go to sleep. I move my head in little motions so that the sound of the fabric in my ear drowns out any other noises. Problem solved. Until...

Until the room goes ice freaking cold despite having the heat on, previously having been warm enough, and me being under a down comforter. This was the final straw. I grab my phone, put on necessary garments and head for the door. Quickly. Chloe actually beats me out of the house. I put her in the car and go to the Walmart parking lot where I call Wesley (sweet Wesley) and ask him what in the hell I should do. We run through the possible solutions that I have already ruled out and decide that I should go to his mom's house, an hour away. Wesley has had his own experience in the house and luckily does not think I've lost my marbles (any more of them anyways).

The past two nights I stayed with Wesley's mom. I contemplated places I could move, thought about how I could avoid staying at the house, so forth and so on. I finally realized that with being so close to graduating, and being so busy with school, wedding, traveling, et al that now was Not the time to move.

So.

Tonight I stay at the house. I waited until sunset and spoke out loud to It, which was only slightly strange. I said 'This is my house. You are not allowed here. I have nothing for you and cannot help you. It's time to move on. Go away.' I feel better about it all after doing that. We shall see tonight. Oh, and for good measure I have my rosary on my bedpost and I plan on sprinkling some holy water I happen to have from a church event a couple of years ago on my door frame. Here's hopin' the booger is gone.

Brick House

I am moving into a house! A real house with a front yard and a back yard, even a carport. It has hardwood floors, three bedrooms (two roommates), washer and drier, tons of space and more than one door leading to the outside world. I even made the extra effort to get out of bed this morning and go to church so that I could give thanks for this blessing.

I have lived in apartments for five years now. I have done my laundry in crappy laundromats for FIVE years now. I've been without a backyard for (say it with me now) FIVE years now. I need to live in a house, absolutely need it. I've lived alone in a two bedroom apartment, with a roommate in a two bedroom apartment (the bitch kicked my cat!), alone in a studio apartment for two years, and now alone in my little living room, kitchen, bedroom, bathroom apartment with black mold in the shower for a year. The time has come... well... almost. I don't move in until August. I can't wait!